There comes a time in every superhero’s life where he questions whether he will ever be able to quit the game. In Hollywood, this time is known as the ‘second movie in the series’. Yes, Bruce Wayne has come down with Superman 2 blues. See, he wants there to be an end point for Batman so he can start settling down thus he decides to pour his money and baterangs into the efforts of Harvey Dent- Gotham’s idealistic, crusading district attorney whose committed into making sure that the mobsters Batman takes down remain down and locked up. Side note: geeks, nerds, fellow comic book readers, guys listen up! You and I both know what Harvey Dent being in the series now means-you know it, I know it, we all know it but lets be considerate and not blurt it out so that the rest of the audience can enjoy their ‘surprise’ when movie 3 arrives.

Dent is a righteous, morally standing good guy which, being a superhero movie, means he might as well move into a little ranch house directly underneath the Sword of Damocles. Oh and one more thing: the main reason Wayne would like to quit the vigilante crime fighting career is so he could rekindle things with Rachel Dawes whose magically turned way hotter and into a good actress between movies. Unfortunately, she is spoken for. In fact, she’s nailing Harvey Dent…awkward…!

Into all of this wanders The Joker; he’s an anarchist, a terrorist, a mad bomber and serial killer and a thief and gangster and…well, whatever else he needs to be. He has no origin, no real name, logic or reason behind his motivations. He’s just there to cause mayhem and madness because he finds it fucking hysterical. He likes to play with the mob, he likes to play with Harvey Dent but he really likes to play with the Batman. There’s no doubt about that last part by the way, Heath Ledger owns this part and it’s a damn shame we won’t see the likes of it again. He gives the best live action version of The Joker period and one of the all-time great imaginings of the character. You have to see it to believe it.

There’s nothing bad to say about this movie. It just rocks, which makes me feel kind of useless here because I normally enjoy finding something to criticise a little bit and… let me think… Oh I got one! Someone really needs to tell Christian Bale to dial it back a bit on that Batman voice. It’s a little much and can’t be good for his throat either.

And one more thing, but this isn't really a stab at this particular movie. Why, after six Batman movies, does Batman’s costume still suck? I mean it! What the hell is going on here? Every Batman movie, no matter what else changes, they always end up over thinking the Batsuit. It’s always too bulky and always looks like a damn suit of armour, which doesn’t make a lick of sense: Batman is supposed to be a super fast, ninja trained guy diving into shadows and dodging bullets and shit but you can never really buy it because it’s obvious Christian Bale can’t move under the bloody thing. And it’s got all this detailing and straps and belts and textures all over it that you can barley make out the tiny bat symbol. I’m sure the costume designer had some theory behind all this and it doesn’t hurt the movie at all… but it’s annoying. I know, not every super hero uniform is going to translate to live action but… BATMAN?! Batman wears the most minimal, simple and plausible looking outfit other than Superman: two colours, a symbol and a belt- is that really too hard to translate? Am I the only one that finds it really odd that ridiculous looking hero’s like Spiderman, Ironman and Ghost Rider look as though they’ve walked off the page but Batman just looks like Robocop in a hastily chosen cosplay?

That’s my minor little bitch about Batman, back to the important stuff. This movie is incredible! You’re not going to believe some of the twists and cameos and details and you’re not going to see anything coming! Just go see it. Go, Now! Turn off your computer and go to the cinema…go!